Curious

Hi im Jack and im gay and everything seemed to be going fine and i was trying to build up the courage to come out to my 2 best friends, but then when we all had a catch up they told me about some of the personal issues they have been having. I dont think i shud say wat it was on a public forum but it was WAY more personal than me being gay. Then they started pressuring me to tell them who i like and now i wish i had told them the truth, especially since they had just trusted me, and i know that they wud be fine with it becos 1 of my mates is bi.

But i didnt tell them and they assumed that i lyk a girl at school. I do like her but im not attracted to her in anyway. Now my friend is going to tell her that i lyk her when i don’t. The problem is i think she lyks me and she is from a very different culture and has never had a boyfriend and wants something REALLY SERIOUS. I care alot about her and i don’t want to be forced into a relationship that means everything to her but nothing to me, but i also want to come out when im ready and not have my friends force me into coming out. If i tell my friends i dont lyk her then they r goin to want an explanation and i dont think im ready to giv it yet, so any1 have any ideas?

Hey Jack!
I would just explain very firmly that you are not interested in dating full stop.

Thanks for the advice and next time she mentions it i’ll tell her im not interested. I just came out to my other bi friend 2nite, and by come out i mean that he found curious and gaynz in my history lol, but we had a little talk about it and I decided there is NO WAY im coming out to my other friend yet, i have absoloutly to trust in her after she told her boyfriend about my bi mates very colourful sex life when he specifically told her not to, then they both made fun of him lyking guys. She also refuses to apologize so she is really being a bit of a b*@ch. But im not worried about that right now cos im finally out!!! so im on a wee bit of a high right now and im feeling really good. Thanks again for the advice moonface it really helped me out while i was trying to figure out what to do.

Id say the best way to let her down would be to just tell her your not looking for anything serious,

Somone cant expect you to enter a full relationship off the bat, its just not fair.

I can tell you care about what she thinks but as selfish as it sounds you need to put your wants before other people somtimes, And id say this would be one of those times, DOnt get involved in a relationship that revolves around the needs and wants of somone else (Ive been there, twice and its not somthing that id wish on other people)

I personally havent come out to alot of my friends, Mostly cause i dont feel they need to know about that part of me as it has no direct effect on their quality of life, But it does help to tell some people, i guess its easier to say these things after youve been ‘out’ for a while.

Stay strong man